Better to fail than never try

I watched an Olympic hopeful on Friday night, along with millions of others. Ilia Malinin took to the ice in men’s figure skating with sky high expectations from all sides. Himself, his father and coach, millions of his countrymen and women, fellow athletes and lots of media hyping and analyzing the hell out of his every move. As I watched, his first small jump seemed to land very smoothly but the next couple of them looked a little bumpy and then the horror, he fell, twice.

I felt for him as I’ve often empathized with young athletes in the highly commercialized world we live in. So much pressure, so much scrutiny, so much at stake. It must get to them sometimes, but most of the time they get through with lots of support from friends, family and mentors. Sometimes things still go wrong, despite all the time put in and all the preparation. Fortunately, Ilia, like many of his competitors and fellow Olympians, is very young and will have another chance, God willing, to reach his potential.

The lesson here for us all is to go for the gold, knowing that you may not get it. You may just miss it, or you may miss by a wide margin. While I’m sure it’s devastating to fall short in such a public way, the important thing is to just do your best and keep trying. Learn from the experience and make improvements. That’s what we all have to do throughout our lives. Failing is not fatal. Your soul is built to handle setbacks in life. It’s worth the risk to go for something big.

I sit here on my couch writing these words and think about the fact that I haven’t really gone for anything big in my life so far. I haven’t written that novel or screenplay. I haven’t given up, but I have become complacent. I’ve stopped hearing the ticking clock. While it’s never too late until you’re gone, I’m not getting any younger.

Yoda says “Do or do not. There is no try.” I guess I’m just not doing. Of course, not every thing you do can be successful, but I think what our little green friend meant is that you approach the goal with the full intention of doing it, not with a wishy washy mentality that you’re just going to put out some feelers and see if maybe there’s a chance of things working out. You just have to do it. That doesn’t mean that you couldn’t still fail, but eventually, you’ll get there. Perhaps it’s a matter of doing it again, rather than trying again. Go for the gold with full intention and your best ability and you’ll succeed. Maybe that success looks different than the top of the podium sometimes, but other opportunities for something better may result from your efforts, whatever the immediate outcome.

Go forth and be active and believe in yourself! Good things will happen.

All Hallows Eve

That’s what Halloween means. It’s the eve of All Saint’s Day. Many ancient cultures believed that spirits of the dead visited on this night. The weather in my area sure fit the day. It was very gray and chilly and windy, with the just changed leaves ripping free from the branches that had so recently sustained them and now flitted and fluttered wildly in the air. It felt spooky, but exhilarating as many folks celebrated in light-hearted fun a day that is steeped in dark and scary traditions.

It’s the third Halloween since my dad passed and my family has had some new concerns and transitions in recent months. I couldn’t help thinking about days gone by and how much life has changed. I miss the wholeness of my family unit and my dad’s quiet strength and stability, but I’m thankful for those traits which he passed on to me along with perseverance and tenacity, and an unflappable confidence borne of a love of life and faith in God.

On this day, with people dressing up as their favorite characters from pop culture, I feel like I can call upon my dad’s presence like Luke Skywalker talking to Obi Wan and Yoda surrounded by their ethereal glow courtesy of The Force. I can’t converse with him and he didn’t give a lot of direct advice, but his steady presence and loving air surround me and guide me.

When someone else is bringing their worries into your aura, expressing anxiety or even panic, it’s hard to hold onto that less tangible spiritual connection, but that’s when you just have to refocus, remember to breathe and put one foot in front of the other. God, and those who have gone before, are with you. And you are with you!

By that I mean that your own consciousness and experience are like an entity unto themselves. You’ve gotten through everything in your life so far and you’re still standing! No one else was there for every minute of that. Only you. So draw confidence from that and remember that you will keep growing and getting better at communing with your spirit, which is connected to God and the loved ones who have moved on. You got this!

Happy All Hallows Eve!

Get Out And Breathe II: Channeling Dad

I have had some extra days off this month due to the availability of voluntary unpaid days off. I took a few because I felt the extra time would be more valuable than the relatively small amount of lost pay. This past Friday was one of those days and I was happy to spend a couple hours of it outdoors with a good friend and her tiny, but valiant dog who led most of the way on our walk at Leaser Lake in northeastern PA. I was familiar with the locale by name and pictures on social media, but had never been there. I’m so glad I finally got there!

As I’ve written about before, getting out in nature is a great way to clear your head and refresh your spirit. Whether you’re in touch with it or not, there’s a natural connection between our souls and the natural world around us. I grew up in a family that, thankfully sought out that connection, going on many hikes, rides and picnics. I also did some camping in my young adulthood, mostly with my brother and cousin. That was very enjoyable even if it is a bit of work. (Probably why I haven’t done it for so long.)

On this adventure with my human and canine companions, my shutterbug self took many photos with my phone while I soaked up the scene with my eyes and my spirit. Being near Halloween, I couldn’t help but think about all the souls that communed with Mother Nature in this place over the years. And then, toward the end of the unexpectedly long walk, (we just started walking without knowing how long a trail we were venturing on) we wound up blazing our own trail for a short distance. It was obvious that the main trail went off to the left sharply, but I thought there was an old trail continuing ahead, so I plunged forward, much to the chagrin of our canine leader who had so faithfully tugged ahead on point.

As we picked our way through the underbrush and through thankfully dry little runoff troughs, I couldn’t help feeling like I was channeling my dad. I don’t think there was ever a hike we went on that he didn’t disappear for a spell, going off trail to explore. I felt connected to him as well as nature in those moments. It felt good to indulge in a shared trait with my dad, our adventurous spirit and love of life. We don’t get to relax and just go where the wind takes us very often while adulting these days.

Thanks for leading me on that hidden trail, Dad.

Here’s some of the lovely scenery the lake environs offered the other day.