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Living, giving, striving

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A commercial for Shriners Hospitals just reminded me to be thankful for what I have, and not feel sorry for myself about the negative things. The kids in the commercials are not sitting around helplessly. They’re working to overcome whatever obstacles life has dealt them.

I can’t speak for them, of course, and I expect that they sometimes feel sad or discouraged. Everyone does. Still, it’s inspiring to see them smiling and handling challenges at very young ages.

I’ve shared some things in this blog that I’ve dealt with, including some health challenges, but I was born with all my limbs, fingers, toes, sight and sound, organs intact and functioning normally and all the things we take for granted.

I feel like I’ve dealt with a lot and have shown a lot of strength and tenacity, and I have, but I would do well to remember that there are so many others who have challenges to deal with every day beyond what I’ve experienced or could even imagine.

I don’t mean to belittle anyone’s personal struggles which may not be as serious or severe as others’ by some measure. We all have crosses to bear, and they are important. The point is that we can take heart from those around us, or that we hear of through media sources.

It’s a strength of humanity that we experience empathy, and have a desire to help and support each other. Many people lament that we’re losing that capacity as we become desensitized, ever busier and harried, distracted, and perhaps, overwhelmed.  Not to mention, how divided we are in recent times.

But, when disasters happen, or a children’s hospital commercial is aired, or any of many causes, people give. Many people volunteer their time to better the lives of others. Family members make sacrifices to make life more livable for their loved ones.

There is good in humanity and we all should be thankful for what we have, and what we are able to do. Remember to give back because we’re all in this together.

Exclusion

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Yesterday, I mentioned about my sister’s chattering driving me nuts, and it concerns me for her own sake. It’s hard for people to tolerate it, and I want to see her have a healthy social life.

While I can’t blame people, and I think she has to work to change that, I think people could give a little more of their time to talk to those who are a little different. I’ve been on the receiving end of exclusion and it hurts as much as direct bullying or snide remarks, if not more.  I’ve been excluded even by friends when everyone did something without me.

I was shy and quiet in school and had anxiety,  which made me socially awkward.  I get that people don’t want to deal with that. I know I’ve done it myself, avoided someone who was “strange” or talks too much, or something.  But, I have learned and grown from experience.

I think everyone has the capacity to do that, if given the chance.   The more a person is around other people, the more “normalized” they become.

Is there someone in your life who needs that chance? Take the time to reach out to them once in a while. I know sometimes you just don’t have the time, or you’re tired or stressed, and that’s fine. You have to take care of yourself. But when you can, be inclusive.

Mental health update, 7/30/18

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I’ve had technical issues and other distractions, but I wanted to give another update on my sister.

She came home after about a week.  As predicted, the insurance company decided to send her home early, against the doctor’s recommendation and the social worker’s protestations. There was not even enough time to bring medication changes to the full dosage. Fortunately, she was well enough this time to stay stable in the meantime. She continues to do well. I just had a nice talk with her.  We’re both trying to lose weight and we trade successes and challenges on that front, among other things.

We can also talk about mental health issues, since I have bipolar depression and anxiety myself. I have pretty good insight into what she goes through.  I like to think I offer some help in coping from what I’ve learned.  And, I’d like to share more about that in coming posts.

I’m relieved she’s doing well, but I still worry about the coming years. There’s the financial issue, and the social. It’s hard to meet and keep friends when you have a serious mental illness. It’s even harder to meet a significant other.

I have to admit that she drives me nuts sometimes when she chatters incessantly. She also tends to turn the conversation back to herself a lot. I hope that I can help her to see that, and maybe learn to listen more. It’s not totally her fault. Her mind races and it’s hard to keep it all in.

It’s a hard knock life.