Dark thoughts of a retail worker

I try to keep a generally positive attitude in life and keep my blog upbeat as well.

Sometimes, though, I don’t feel real positive, especially toward the end of a work day.  That’s when we do “Recovery and facing”.  Recovery is returning things to their rightful place, and facing is pulling product forward on the shelf to make it look nice and neat and “full”.

What a mess people make.

Clothes on the floor.  Do you just drop clothes on the floor at home that you’re not going to wear?  The toy aisle is always trashed.  Do people not make their kids put their things away at home?  I guess if you don’t know how to act in public, you’re not going to teach your kids to do so.  I made the comment once to a former coworker that I think people make a mess on purpose.  He said of course, and that “we” used to do that when we were kids and now we have to clean up when other people do it.  I said, “Who’s we?  I never did that and neither did any of my friends.  Our parents would have had our hides if we did that.”

Then there’s the lady who comes in every day just to put things out of place all over the store.  I figured out who was doing it because she did it right behind me and when I turned around, saw the foreign item she had deposited.  I couldn’t believe she was that brazen about it.  I wasn’t 100% positive that the item wasn’t there before she came in the aisle and back out real quick, so next time she came in, I looked around after she left and found stray items in the usual places, so I knew it was her.  I planned to confront her, gently, the next time I saw her.  I did a sort of double take when she came in next, but was busy waiting on customers.  She must have seen the look because she got real sneaky from then on, and I haven’t even seen her.  She sneaks in and out, never buys anything, every f’ing day.  She must have OCD or something, but that’s no excuse.  I have bipolar, but I don’t go around behaving inappropriately.  She must live within sight of the store since she seems to strike when we’re real busy and don’t see her come in.  She’s like a ghost – a mess making, pain in the ass ghost.

As I do my recovery at the end of the day, I can’t help thinking that it’s people who don’t work, and white trash, and ghetto folk, and the lower segment of the population.  I get some dark thoughts, like thinking of some people as “welfare rats”.  When I find messes, I think “scumbags”.  I don’t like to be that way.

Then there’s the theft.  When the anti-theft alarm at the door goes off, a lot of people don’t even stop or make eye contact.  They know you can’t chase them.  Although, my former manager, now at another store, does just that.  They haven’t fired her yet.  ha ha

Just as annoying, or perhaps even moreso, perhaps because of the brashness of it, are the bogus “returns”.  You know when something is not right.  Either they stole it from another store, or they just took it off the shelf and “return” it.  You ask questions and try to make it difficult for them, but in the end, you end up giving them a refund.  Of course, you can only give store credit without a receipt if it’s over $5.00.  If you aren’t sure it’s bogus, you know when they want to buy cigarettes with their ill gotten booty, that it is definitely not a legit return.

I sometimes find myself saying, “I hate people”.  I don’t like to be that way.

That’s why I try to keep a rapport with some of the regulars I’ve told you about.  I dont’ want to dwell on the negtives.  It only gives them power.

So, after venting, I still believe that most people are decent.  If shrink is at 3% and setting off red flags with Loss Prevention, then that means the overwhelming majority of people deign to pay for merchandise.

P.S.: I had to edit this post a little.  I was getting really sleepy at the end when I first wrote it.

 

First impressions (are often wrong)

The first time I waited on an older red-haired lady at work, I hated her.  She was fussy and impatient.  I saw her talking to my manager afterward and assumed she was complaining about me.  I thought she was a real bitch, and wrote her off in my head.

The next time I waited on her she was polite but cool towards me.  I responded in kind.  It went like that for several encounters.  Then one time she greeted me a little less coldly.  I thought to myself that maybe she just was having a bad day the first time I met her.  I tried to be a little more attentive.  She seemed to get it.

Then she was talking to someone else about voting.  (It was near election time last year.)  The conversation had turned to how expensive everthing is getting and she said that she’s on social security since she’s retired and how it’s hard to get by on that.  She ended up saying to vote Democratic so we don’t lose any more.  Since I’m progressive, I was in total agreement.  I let her know I agreed and the next time I saw her we made more friendly conversation.  Since then, we’ve had many more good conversations, including our dislike of antibacterial products and how they aren’t good for you.  A person needs to be exposed to germs to keep your immune system strong.  Plus, those products help create drug resistant super germs.  I commented that it’s all the marketing by companies trying to sell more antibacterial products that’s creating a society of germophobes.  She enthusiastically endorsed my observation.

So, now, whenever I wait on her, I know I’ll have an interesting conversation, if there’s time.  (We get pretty busy at ye olde dollar shop.)  I don’t know if I’d get tired of her if we hung out, but she went from a dreaded customer to a pleasant “regular”.

It makes me wonder how much we miss out on in life when we stick to our snap judgements and treat first impressions as absolutely accurate assessments of a person, written in stone, never to be reconsidered.

What if you met your potential soulmate when you were both having an off moment?  If fate allowed another meeting, as it well might, if you’re meant to be soulmates, would you be open to a fresh start?  A new encounter not based on a single previous meeting?

Of course, I’m not saying to disregard your instincts or intuition.  They often serve to protect you.  If you distrust someone, there may be reason.  I’m just saying that sometimes, this busy, varied, modern life sometimes leads to crossed signals, missed opportunities, and needless animosity.

Don’t throw caution to the wind, but do remain open to your fellow humans for at least two encounters.  You never know what might happen.

Leaving office

For the past several years, I’ve been president of a group called Allentown Film Crew.  We aren’t a film appreciation group.  We actually make short films.  On average, two of them a year.

The group was started about 7 years ago through meetup.com.  There was a hiatus after the first two projects that lasted about a year and a half.  Another original member and myself got it going again, kind of by accident.  We planned on having some kind of reunion event, but scheduling something on a weekend wasn’t working, so we just met on our old Tuesday night and the rest is history.  It was at least six months before we decided we needed officers.  I was elected president.   I didn’t really do a lot until one of the co-leaders left.  At that point, I held the group together and we produced a film, the only one that year.

Now, I’m in the last few weeks of my tenure.  I announced to the group that I was stepping down as president toward the end of this month (Sept.).  Don’t worry, there was no scandal or any shady dealings.  The reasons I cited in my email to the other three members of the leadership team were to free up time for other interests and looking for a better job.  Also, I stated to them that I simply didn’t want to do it anymore, and therefore, couldn’t do it justice.

When I subsequently announced to the rest of the group at our meeting August 26th, one of the more outspoken members immediately asked why.  I gave similar reasons.  Later that night, I found myself asking why don’t I want to do it?  I mean, I don’t, and that’s the main reason for my decision when it comes down to it.  But why don’t I want to?

It’s been good for me in that it has helped me build leadership skills, get more organized, network and the like.  (I still have plenty of room for improvement in all those areas.)  I also facilitated the meetings and have gotten much more comfortable talking in front of a group.

While the group has grown a lot and I had no small part in that, I can’t say that I’ve accomplished everything I wanted to, so that’s not a reason for shedding the mantle of leadership.   It’s definitely not a people problem.  It’s a great bunch of people.  I haven’t lost interest in film or writing.  At least, no more than anything else when I’m feeling low on energy or depressed.  Ok, there’s part of it.  The thing is, I’m always glad I went to a meeting, even if I didn’t feel like it beforehand.  So, of course, I’m staying involved, just not as president.

 

(CONT.)  Didn’t finish my draft.  It’s now Tuesday, October 14.

We had the first group meeting that I wasn’t president tonight.  I still wound up facilitating due to the new president being unable to get there by the start time because of her work schedule.  So, it wasn’t a lot different at this point.  It did give me a chance to reflect and I feel that I’ve made the right decision.  Trisha, the new prez, has a lot more energy and enthusiasm than I have.  I guess it is largely due to depression, after all.  I suppress it, but it’s there.  Part of that is being alone, no significant other.  That’s a topic for another post.

Some of Trisha’s ideas are similar to my own.  The difference is, she will follow through on them.  So, I’m happy to pass the reigns while staying involved in a group that makes films.  That was a long time aspiration of mine and I’m doing it.  Not professionally, albeit, but I’m in it.  I’m not sitting home nights that I don’t work, feeling sorry for myself or watching the idiot box, and Allentown Film Crew is going strong, largely thanks to me (during the aforementioned critical time).

So this post comes to an end, not as the perfect Hollywood happy ending, but as the more real indie style mixed happy ending.  I’m at peace with the degree of accomplishment I achieved, though not what I’d hoped, and I’m still part of something pretty special and unique.

Allentown Film Crew